Let’s put ourselves in the shoes of the average guy, who has constant access to dirty videos on the internet. So much so, that his faithful right-hand has become sore. He would like to experience the real thing, though. Where to start?

There are so many girls everywhere. On the street. At the cafe. At the library. At the mall!

He might think:

“Oh, my God. Here’s one. She’s pretty. I’m so nervous. If I had the courage to approach her, what would I say? I can’t remember those pickup lines! What if she rejects me? I remember, years ago I approached one girl, and she blew me off. I felt so ashamed, it took me weeks to get over it. What is going to happen to me this time? I haven’t talked to any girl for a couple of years!”

“Oh well, she’s gone now. Fortunately, tonight I’ll have my revenge when I watch the latest video at IamYourBiatchSoPleaseTakeMeInEveryHole.com.”

“Wait… Here’s another girl. Wow, she’s hot. There is no way she’s single. She must be married already. Let’s see… no ring! She must have a boyfriend. One of those smart+handsome+rich asshole guys. Or maybe I can steal her from this jackoff? I need a strategy. I went to a big school and I work for a big corporation, dammit. I’m good at standardized tests! What am I going to say here? Brag about my cubicle job? What if she makes fun of me in front of everyone, and the entire room laughs at me? My stellar reputation will be ruined!”

“Oh well. I guess tonight is going to be another session of Mano Solo. Another pants-down fireworks party in front of my laptop.”

“Wait! Here’s an idea. Online-dating websites! Yeah! I don’t need to take any risk! Last time I checked, it cost $29.99 to signup for this kind of website. I can afford that!”

—————

Admittedly, from a business standpoint, dating websites are awesome.

The need: universal. Who doesn’t want love?

The business-model: monthly subscription automatically linked to users’ credit cards. Frictionless.

The technology behind it: essentially a relational database, could be coded by a 15-year-old passionate programmer.

The cost of running it: probably open-source software such as Linux and MySQL, and some bandwidth to send the juice through the pipes. Almost free.

These websites make money. Tons of it. Now, how do they serve customers?

There are several stages in Love between two people.

In that order: pickup, dating, relationship, marriage.

One cannot get a Ph.D until he has graduated from grad school. Nor go to grad school until he has graduated from college.

Pickup is kindergarden, really. If a guy can’t even do that, does he have the balls to love, protect, serve, provide, and support the woman even in the most difficult and unusual situations that life will inevitably throw at them?

One cannot even begin to handle dating, until he has worked his way through his approach anxiety to the point of being able to pickup any girl he wants, anywhere, any time, even in the most unusual places and situations. In fact, ESPECIALLY in the most unusual situations.

It’s easy to talk to a girl in a social environment, or when mutual friends are around.

On the other hand, respectfully approaching a woman cold, in an elevator, or at a store, risking humiliation in front of everyone, while having consideration for her and making sure she’s not embarrassed but rather honored, tells an entirely different story about the essence of the man.

Like cold-calling in sales, cold-approaches are the most difficult. Dating and relationships come next. Real men continuously work on themselves at the deepest levels, and there is no cheating or shortcuts available to transcend all sorts of fears, habits, and programming. Sometimes, it takes years of sweat, blood, and tears. Unwavering discipline, yet painful failures, sleepless nights crying, hundreds of pages of notes read and written, increasingly difficult self-assignments to push his own limits, and a bruised heart with deep scars. That’s what it takes for a chance at being enrolled at the School of Love, the most selective of all.

Marriage, the ultimate level, is reserved to those who have mastered all previous stages. Ladies would much rather go for the fearless man who is capable of picking up any girl in a random place, because ironically, he won’t fool around — he knows how precious real love is. On the other hand, guys who have too much fear are the ones who stare at other women when you’re not around, fantasizing that “perhaps he could get a better girl” in an endless cycle.

The enormous and continuous homework than any man has to do on himself gives him the discernment, the ability to appreciate similar qualities in others. He has standards that go way beyond appearances. Counter-intuitively, if the guy isn’t good with women, he cannot be trusted. Faking it playing the macho won’t cut it — women are too smart and intuitive to be fooled. Only a man who went through the pain of doing his homework will be faithful, because he consciously chose the woman, if she gave him the honor to choose him as well.

So… Are you a woman, looking for Mister Right? Online dating websites are the LAST place you want to go, unless you want a one-handed internet surfer. Social environments aren’t much better. If you still want to go, you’ll get plenty of dates. But, just like Walmart, you’ll trade quality for quantity. You can always return the merchandise and get it recycled for the next person, but you’ll have wasted your time. Is this what you deserve?

A real man has to be able to pick you up. To Pick. You. Up. To sweep you off your feet. To have the balls to approach you wherever you might be, at the least expected moment, risking total failure and humiliation, in the name of Love. Because for sure, in this uncertain world, you’ll be glad he has what he’s supposed to have between his legs, and not only for tonight.

The favorite spots are ANYWHERE. Heck, if that’s in a parking lot while he’s washing his car and wearing wet clothes, so be it. If she’s there, she’ll be approached with no hesitation.